CELEBRATION - May 04, 2011

I have never been more happier in my life!! This atrocity of a stitched piece is done!! It is absolutely horrible.

HOWEVER, the bride and groom personally selected the three colors and the fabric and color. They have seen the progress along the way and continued to love it!! Perhaps, they feared upsetting me as every one assumes I am still right on the "edge" of things.

Whatever, I could not care as it is FINISHED!! I have never been happier with a piece I have detested never as much!!

It surely goes without saying, I am still ever so grieving and missing my beloved Max and our darling little Miprezious. I purchased a lawn swing today with a big awning attached. Of course, Eunice was with me to oversee I did nothing too crazy!! We had to wait for the store employees to load this large piece, or I should say pieces, into her truck. As we waited, Eunice remarked all I needed was to go now and purchase another "teacup" baby. My mother was on the speaker phone and quickly added nothing stays small that I am in charge of!! Eunice thinks if I could keep a new "teacup" small that it would be little trouble to me and ever so much company and enjoyment. Lets say I am surely glad we were no where near a breeder, thankfully, so I was not able to actually see a new baby and surely want and have to have it. And, I soon thought about the care involved and just am not too sure if I am able to do this currently.

Eunice began telling me that I could easily do this after all I have recently gone through and done and also began telling me how lovely it would be for me to be able to sit out on my new swing with a new baby be side me.

I think I will re-think this one very long and hard before I go visiting my favorite breeder for now.

I do so miss my beloved dear ones, but it truly has helped that I am keeping so busy. Being as disabled as I am it takes me at least ten times longer to do any thing, but I have learned the patience it takes to just do regardless of how long it takes me. I have began going through each room and re-organizing it and moving Max's things elsewhere so I do not have to be surprised with continually finding them at the most inopportune moments. I also need to get this home made as safe as possible for my own access and movements. The downsizing is about to begin!!

I have pretty much learned to go to church by my self with out being so utterly discomfortable. I still say a church pew is the most loneliest place in the entire world!! I am hoping to begin meeting some of the congregation soon as I have decided to begin the new membership classes this coming Sunday and will consider changing my church affiliation to Methodist from Episcopal. Unfortunately, our Episcopal church has just begun to sink and I do not see any good outcomes for it. This Methodist church just picked us up, out of the blue, a few years ago and held a benefit for me and my medical needs along with putting in the handicap ramps, and so many, many other things. The biggest thing was the Associate Pastor was able to befriend Max and he was the very most caring person ever to him, as well as my self. This Pastor was the person who presented Max's entire medical status and it's options to Max and helped Max make the decision he was not going to continue to fight a useless battle and wished hospice to take over. I could never have presented all this to him and it was such a blessing to me to have Max actually tell me enough was enough and that he wanted hospice brought in.

So, I can continue to do and be I guess. I am okay and can see the light at the end of the tunnel finally in there is hope this will all get better enough to want to go on.

Well, hopefully some where on this is a couple of pictures of the atrocity called "Toile Lace"!!

Love and Hugs!!

Deborah