Unfortunately, another tidal wave of grief swept over and drowned me on the evening of Thanksgiving and it is just now beginning to go away.
Yes, my friends made sure I had a "good" Christmas (have to post the lovely gift pictures as Debra Hall made me an exquisite quilted angel hanging and Kathy Kiley made me a very precious Christmas ornament), but nothing could hide I was truly alone. My entire family was Max and Miprezious and they are now gone so I have to truly try to create some other traditions for all the holidays. I am surely going to do better this year!!
The past few years I rarely left Max's bedside. There is no other place that I would have opted to be, however, those days were unbearably long and hard. Thankfully, I was blessed with my cross stitch. Max began reciting the 23rd Psalm with our Pastor almost daily. I do not believe in coinsequences!! However, just prior to this daily routine Max had started, I purchased PSALM 23 by MY BIG TOE. I do not know what possessed me to buy this originally, but I did. Once I realized I did have this chart and the fabric to stitch it on I excitedly showed them to Max. Max took great interest in my progress, which was barely nothing each day as hospital is not greatest place to try to stitch this large of a project, and he watched with great interest as I worked on it. About two weeks in to this project Max asked if I would do him a great favor and complete this project. Max truly knew my stitching ways!! I told him I would do my best, but that this project was going to take months. Max was well aware that he was in the process of passing from this earth a good two weeks prior to it actually happening. Max was rather alert the first two days of this time. In fact, it was Max (along with extensive chats with our Pastor) that decided he had enough struggles and pain and wanted to be placed on hospice. Being placed on hospice meant immediate termination of his despised dialysis and the fact he would pass within the following few days (Max clung to me for seven more days!!). Max made this decision on March 01 and the Pastor stayed with us all day and well into the evening that day to be with us. As the day progressed, the Pastor received a cell phone call that was from a large group of people singing "Happy Birthday" to him. I was so upset that the Pastor had spent his entire day and evening with us in spite of it being his own birthday, however, he kept assuring us it was where he wanted to be. During this day, Max wanted to chat with me while the Pastor was out of the room for a bit. Max asked if I would be sure and do some thing for him and I told him I would do any thing I could. Max asked me to finish the PSALM 23 and get it matted and framed the best I could do and give it to his dear friend, the Pastor, this year on his March 01 birthday. And, of course, I agreed. Max proceeded to smile the entire next hours and every one asked what he was so happy about and he kept answering he was going to get the best birthday gift ever.
Well, true to form, for me, I could not even stand to look at this project last year whatsoever. It kept coming to the top of my rotation and I would put it aside. Had it been any other piece of this size I probably would have put it in my perpetual UFO bin. I reasoned I would take it out on Christmas and get quite serious on it. Well, that surely did not happen. I still reasoned that I had three good months to do it if I restarted it on New Year's Day. And, I got it out and had every thing ready to stitch. And, big time reality hit!! I do not have a good three months as March does not count. Additionally, I am probably looking at a minimum of three weeks to have it framed. Thus, I have been stitching like a crazed driven woman the last week!!
Below, is a picture of my progress through Friday, January 06. The picture below it is my progress of a marathon ILCS "Virtual Stitch In" yesterday on Saturday, January 07.
Needless to say, I need to get my self back in to my stitching nest and have a "Virtual Stitch In" the entire rest of this month. My biggest problem is I keep falling asleep as I am too comfy in my nest! I hope the good Lord is threading each needle and taking each stitch with me!! I need a miracle!!
This piece will be beautiful, but I am only about one-third done with the main center. I will have days with that border. It very much reminds me of that horrible wedding sampler I did last May!!
And, life goes on. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .!! And, I will rejoice in it!!
Love and Hugs!!
Deborah
13 comments:
Beautiful piece, take your time don't make it a chore. Love you and think about you all the time.
I'm sure that Max wouldn't want it to be such a chore for you. Even though his birthday is March 1, he will still appreciate the gift even if it's not his birthday....and maybe even more since he wouldn't be expecting anything when it's not his birthday. If you need any help on it, just let me know.....I have finished another piece for you, remember?? LOL I'm not in ILCS group anymore....so I only keep up with you through your blog posts.
Take your time and don't stress out. If you don't get it done by March 1 then that is ok, you do what you can. It is beautiful already.
Do what you can and give it as a belated gift later, if need be. I'm sure your pastor would be thrilled now matter what!
Take your time and don't get frustrated!! It will be gorgeous when you have it completed. I love Big Toe Designs and I have Amazing Grace in my UFO pile that I must get back too really soon!!
Dear Deborah I am sure you will complete this piece even though the time is short and even if it is a bit late I am sure the Pastor will love it.
It's amazing Deborah! I'm so glad you picked it up.
*hugs* dear. It's tough, but you're doing pretty darn good!
Don't push too hard on the stitching though, make sure it's still fun. It will be appreciated no matter when it's given.
It looks beautiful so far, Deborah. Don't feel rushed to get it finished by March 1st. I'm sure the Pastor will appreciate it whenever you give it to him.
It looks beautiful, Deborah! I especially like the color of the floss.
- Lisa N. in Cambodia (or, more accurately, the Bangkok airport)
Chill Deborah, it will get done, if not for your pastors birthday, maybe a belated birthday.
Mary Louise
That border is gorgeous even is it will take a while. Hopefully, the message of this psalm comforts you as you stitch & in times of sorrow. Sorry the meds have you sleeping a lot.
Beautiful story. You'll get it done.
I hope you're enjoying it while you work on it too. Good luck getting it done in time, Deborah, and I can't wait to see it finished (even if it is late). Will say a prayer for you!!
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